T’Hersday: Lollipop Chainsaw

by on April 4th, 2013 at 12:30 pm

Today I want to talk about a game that gives me mixed feelings. On the one hand, I adore the ever-loving shit out of this game. On the other, it makes me feel like a sexist pervert who is one lost moral away from dry-humping everything that moves. That game is Lollipop Chainsaw. For those not in the know: Lollipop Chainsaw was released about a year ago from the Japanese developer Grasshopper Manufacture. My cohort and venerable leader Josh has given his opinion on the CEO of Grasshopper Manufacture, Suda51.

Now, a little about Lollipop Chainsaw itself:

Lollipop Chainsaw

I am seriously not joking in that this is the only introduction I’m giving you to the game. Zombies. Rainbows. Severed head boyfriend. Masturbatory fantasy protagonist.

This game is shit. I know it is shit. I love it anyway. So why exactly do I love it? Even I am not sure of my true motivation. I mean, the hack-and-slash gameplay becomes monotonous. But I couldn’t stop playing. Perhaps these reasons will shed some light:

The music fits so perfectly with this game. It’s amazing.
The jokes are often funny and clever.
I get to kill zombies with a chainsaw.
The art is phenomenal.

Those are all well and good. But we can’t ignore the big breasted, scantily-clad cheerleader in the room.

This game is all about sexualizing Juliet Starling. She sucks on lollipops the whole damned game, gets different and increasingly skimpier outfits, and is subjected to rude and outright perverse comments.

They claim she’s 18. Doesn’t matter. Overly-sexualizing any person is a big no-no.

Here is where my moral dilemma lies: Is this why I love this game?

Have I learned a profound truth about myself? No, I haven’t. Every single person I look at is subject to my narcissistic sex-drive. My first thought isn’t, “I want to have sex with them.” I know that I’d have sex with damn near any willing participant. No. It’s, “I wonder if they’d have sex with me.” I’m so fucking vein that, if it were socially acceptable, I’d ask every single person if they’d fuck me.

Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me

Would you fuck me? I’d fuck me

Let’s facilitate some discussion:

Am I hurting feminism by playing this game?

Would you play this game?

Is it somehow OK to be sexist when it is openly and knowingly joked about and perhaps even celebrated? That is: Is it better than being oblivious to one’s own sexism?

Validate or vilify my playing Lollipop Chainsaw, whichever you choose.

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