Injustice: Gods Among Us

by on April 18th, 2013 at 12:09 pm


Hooray for birthdays! Though I may be almost 30 years old I still rake in Best Buy gift cards every year. This year I raked in enough to purchase Injustice: Gods Among Us. For a DC fanboy such as myself, this is like being blown by an angel. Being blown by an angel while playing a video game. Fuck that Marvel “we’re all flawed” bullshit. I want my comic books characters to be larger-than-life! BOW BEFORE THE POWER OF SUPERMAN!

Dude can move planets.

Dude can move planets.


Spoilerific. ForniSpoilercation. TotesSpoilsYo. Spoilers if you give a fuck about the story of a brawler.


Bow before the power of Superman is exactly the premise of Injustice: Gods Among Us. What if Superman decided to turn his godlike powers to the task of subjugating mankind? Play the game and fucking find out!


Twenty four characters are available for your unbelievable enjoyment. Some have never seen the likes of video gamedom before. Play as Green Arrow? Yes, fucking, please. It’s like all of my jizz-tastic, jizz-erific dream have come true. After a night of gameplay, my reserves are drained.


Each character has his or her own special abilities and attacks; beautifully crafted. Run around the globe as The Flash. Punch a foe into orbit as Superman. Break backs as Bane. Uh-oh. My reserves are building again.


They could stick this in a fucking parking lot setting and I’d still play it. They didn’t. Each level is obviously a depiction of somewhere in the DC universe. Wayne Manor. The Daily Planet. Ferris Air. Arkham Asylum. All available for your epic throwdowns.

Grundy gets hit by the fucking

Grundy gets hit by the fucking Bat…mobile


As if that weren’t good enough, each level is loaded with nods to comic fans. The Atom is working in the background. Martian Manhunter is holding down the Watchtower. Atom Smasher and Giganta are trading punches above the city skyline. Tired of the scenery you’re in? You can punch your character through the wall and into the next arena. They take damage the whole way. It’s eye candy and a useful mechanic to inflict some extra damage.


I don’t normally play brawlers because ass-kickings are abound for me and I’m a big baby when it comes to losing. I play video games to win, damn it! Still, this game pushes all the right buttons for me. (My penis. It pushes my penis.)